I felt for the first time that the system I had long considered sacred was in fact unbearably absurd.

My experience with the study outline taught me that the ideas the party sanctimoniously promoted were in fact self-serving tools used to deceive the Chinese people. I soon learned that they were also a way of making money.

Like here, the founding myths can't be questioned even when they are only paid lip service to. This is the case everywhere. Interesting perspective that Xi is essentially a moron princeling.